‘A link in a chain’ – An autobiographical sketch
Michael Whelan SM
(July 2023)
“I have a part in this great work; I am a link in a chain, a bond of connexion between persons. He has not created me for naught. I shall do good, I shall do His work; I shall be an angel of peace, a preacher of truth in my own place, while not intending it, if I do but keep His commandments and serve Him in my calling”. (From a reflection by John Henry Newman dated March 7 1848. See John Henry Newman (1801-1890), Meditations and Devotions, Edited by Rev. W. P. Neville, Longmans, Green and Co, 1907, 302).
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An autobiographical statement is, in some way, a response to the question: Who am I? There are different ways to approach the question. Any response will be a particular interpretation, incomplete and perspectival.
Over time, I have come to think more “we” than “I”, to begin to appreciate the effects of shared DNA, shared experiences and shared stories. On a number of occasions, I have given autobiographical statements in response to requests from others. Typically, they are “factual” and “functional” with little or no account being taken of the “we” or the DNA or the shared experiences or the shared stories.
I am approaching this sketch differently. This is a very particular perspective and interpretation. I have found the writing rewarding and revealing.
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A very significant part of my autobiography is to be found in each of my four great grandmothers. I have chosen one of them – Nellie Scanlan – because I have most details about her. In her story I find a substantial part of my story.
Nellie’s story begins in Cork.[1] Her parents were John and Mary Scanlan. They had 8 children. Three of those children – Ellen, Jeremiah and Thomas – died in Ireland. Thomas was one-year old when he died just before the family boarded a ship – Beejapore – on 25 March 1863 bound for Australia. Four-year old Patrick and two-year old Catherine died on the high seas – along with thirty other children. Six-year old Honora died soon after they arrived in Rockhampton, Queensland. The two remaining children were nine-year old James and eight-year old Mary.
There were 667 passengers aboard that ship.[2] They did not touch land until they reached Keppel Bay off the Queensland coast nearly four months after leaving Ireland. The journey included some time in freezing conditions as the the Roaring Forties was sought once they rounded the Cape of Good Hope. A record from an English passenger’s diary at the time recorded two families – a total of twelve people – in a cabin 9 feet by 6 feet. I suppose this was typical of most of the accommodation on the ship. Passengers got some rations of biscuits but for the most part they had to provide four months of food with no refrigeration or cooking facilities. They also had to bring their own toilet paper.
Fortunately for the Scanlans, there was a demand for farm labourers when they disembarked in Queensland.
On 24 January 1864, John and Mary’s son Timothy was born in Rockhampton. John spent a short time on the gold fields before he and Mary moved the family to Brisbane. It was a short time before they left Brisbane and headed for Roma. Mary was pregnant with Nellie – my maternal great grandmother.
Nellie was born in 1866 on 1st of June in Roma, Queensland.
John worked on properties in that area. On Christmas night 1878, John was staying overnight with Nellie at a friend’s place when Mary – at home by herself – was burned to death when their “house” caught fire. At the inquest John described their “house”:
“The house was built of round, upright saplings, roofed with bark and lined all round with calico inside both walls and roof. The house was eleven feet by fifteen feet and six feet high at the wallplate. There was an open fire at the back of the house about 10 to 12 feet away.”
In 1882 Nellie was Belle of the Ball in Mt Morgan. She was sent to St Anne’s Industrial School in Brisbane[3] where she learned dressmaking and embroidery. (I recall a large white table cloth – featuring Australian wild flowers – which she had embroidered and given to my mother.)
Nellie married Patrick Joseph Conmee on 12th June 1886, in All Saints Catholic Church, Roma. Patrick, a well-educated man, had emigrated from Ireland in 1881. Nellie was walked down the aisle by Mr Edward Rees, Town Clerk of Roma. I don’t know where her father was.
Patrick Conmee was a businessman[4] and very involved in the town life of Roma and the district. For example, in April 1888 at a Union meeting of shearers in Roma, Patrick was elected secretary and became the Roma Agent for the Union.[5]
To supplement their income, Nellie, ever-resourceful and resilient, opened her own school. The Western Champion (Blackall/Barcaldine) newspaper carried the advertisement on Tuesday 21 July 1891:
“Mrs Conmee, having opened a Private School, is prepared to teach Music, Fancy Work, Poonah and Lustre Painting, at moderate prices
Amidst multiple changes of address and employment, Patrick and Nellie had four sons: Patrick (Pat) born 24th August 1887, James (Jim) born 22nd March 1889, Thomas (Tom) was born 4th September 1890 and Robert (Bert) was born 10th July 1892.
By 1894, Patrick and Nellie had separated. Nellie went back to Mt Morgan with her four sons. She moved in with Louis Halberstater – a (non-practising) Jewish immigrant from Germany, master butcher and mayor of Mt Morgan. Her eldest son, Patrick, lived in Barcaldine with his father for a while.
The relationship with Louis lasted about 18 months. My mother’s mother was born 30th March 1895 while Nellie was living with Louis Halberstater. She was named Louisa (after Louis?) Dympna Kathleen Conmee. For some years, we assumed the mayor of Mt Morgan was her father. However, thanks to Ancestry.com and some DNA testing, it seems that the manager of the Mt Morgan gold mine was her father. His name was Vincent Mackay Dowling – a married man with 12? children. He was also a grandson of Lord James Dowling, one-time Chief Justice in NSW.
When Nellie and Louis separated, she was in a desperate situation – five young children and no means of support. She attempted suicide by overdosing on chlorodyne.[6] The attempt failed. She was sentenced to one minute in gaol. The four boys spent the next six months in the Sister’s of Mercy orphanage, Neerkol.
Nellie had a sixth child – Kathleen Mary Conmee – who died at the age of 4 months. We do not know who the father was.
Nellie found her way to Sydney via Bundaberg – where she formed a “relationship” which produced twins Gladys Cecilia and Vivien Vincent on 30 March 1899 – and some other towns, eking out a living for herself and her five children. She eventually arrived in Sydney in February 1904.
In 1905, Nellie took 17-year old Pat and went to work in Goodooga, leaving 15-year old Tom to look after the others in Sydney and pay down a loan Nellie had taken out. Tom got involved in petty crime. One evening he found himself in a hotel room where he was trying to steal jewellery. The lady came to the room. He murdered her. He was arrested, charged, convicted and condemned to death – a mandatory sentence at that time. But being only 15-years old, he was sent to serve time in Goulburn gaol.
Meanwhile, Nellie used her mother’s maiden name to marry Thomas Henry Kinchington of Dumble Station near Goodoga. They had one child – my “Aunty Marie”.
When Nellie moved to Goulburn to be close to Tom she became very involved in Labor politics, writing letters to the editor of various newspapers, public debating and charitable causes such as the St Vincent de Paul and looking after young women from the courts for 14 years.[7] She also fought against conscription during the First World War, though actively recruited men for the war effort.[8]
Tom was later released and, along with Pat, Jim and Bert, signed up for service in the First World War. Tom was killed on active service, Bert died in Ireland of septic pneumonia while on furlough, Pat – served on Gallipoli, awarded the Military Medal at Fleurbaix, France – returned to Australia badly injured, Jim went to Gallipoli and won the Military Medal, returned to Australia and served again in World War II in the Middle East and New Guinea. Nellie’s son Vin – Vivien Vincent, twin of Gladys – also served during World War I and II.
My parents are Brian Whelan and Dympna Hickey of Bondi, NSW. Her mother is the Louisa Dympna mentioned above. To me she was “Nanna”. Her mother is the indomitable Nellie Scanlan whom I met before she died in 1957. I knew her as “Nanna Kinchington”.
When I was in the seminary in the 1960s and early 70s, I visited Nanna in her Bellevue Hill apartment often. Nanna was a gracious lady. One day, we were alone in the large lounge room. Nanna leaned forward, and, in a whisper, she said: “You know, we never knew whether Mother would be home or not”.
I find great solace and sadness, inspiration and encouragement, in recalling the story of Nellie Scanlan. It is my story. A host of thoughts come to mind. The extraordinary suffering Nellie endured, her capacity to rise from the ashes, hold her head high and get on with life, the pain she inflicted on her children – especially young Tom – her energy for good causes in helping those in need, her political fervour, her willingness to engage in public debate …. and not much piety or moralism or victimhood in any of it.
My mother – Dympna (“Dymp”) Mary Hickey – was born in Denham Street, Bondi on the 21st of December 1920. Her father was John (“Jack”) Hickey, a solicitor. His family came from Quirindi. Mum lived at 56 Penkivil Street Bondi and attended Holy Cross College, Woollahra as a girl. She always spoke very fondly of the Sisters of Mercy – especially Mothers Thecla and Gonzaga. She had one sibling, John, who was born on the 25th of June 1922 and died on the 19th of April 1998. Mum died on the 26th of April 2009 in the McQuoin Park nursing home, Waitara. Mum was thoughtful, methodical, consistent and persistent, not given to expressions of emotion. She had a deep sense of commitment and remarkable endurance. I think she was also very contemplative.
My father – Brian Joseph Whelan – was born on the 2nd of July 1921. He was an only child. His father was Jeremiah (“Faye”) Francis Whelan who died on 1st October 1964. He worked for Unilever in sales. Jeremiah’s father, Stephen Whelan, came from County Kerry in Ireland and married Johanna Murphy from Fermoy, County Cork, in St Mary’s Cathedral, Sydney in 1872. We are not aware of any of Stephen’s or Johanna’s siblings making their home in Australia. Stephen was a plasterer and he built a number of tenement houses in Paddington. He lived at 87 Hargrave Street in Paddington before moving into the Grand National Hotel which he also built. The financial crisis of 1893 left him without much. Dad grew up in Stanley Street Randwick and attended Waverley College where he excelled at rugby. Dad died on the 3rd of December 2013, also in the McQuoin Park nursing home, Waitara. Dad was impulsive, not methodical, but persistent and given to expressions of emotion. Dad also had a deep sense of commitment and remarkable endurance. Dad had a special predilection for the poor and those left behind by life.
Dympna Hickey and Brian Whelan were married on April 9 1942. Dad joined the RAAF and spent much of the war overseas, mostly with a radar unit in West Papua. They managed to get the family underway however before the war ended. I am the fourth of thirteen children – ten boys and three girls. Martin was the seventh child – named after St Martin de Porres – and he died before his first birthday, on November 3 1952, the feast of St Martin. Margaret (“Meg”) was the second child, the second eldest and second mother to most of us. She was born on the 10th of May 1944 and died of cancer in New York on the 6th of October 2013. She had moved to New York in 1989 with her husband Ken and family. I am especially grateful to Ken for the way he cared for Meg in her last years. Meg gave me a ring for my fortieth birthday, and I continue to wear it.
When Dad was discharged from the RAAF he completed his teacher’s training at Sydney Teacher’s College, 1946-47, by which time I was born. We lived at 33 Percival Road, Carringbah, at the time. I was born in St Margaret’s Hospital, Darlinghurst, on the 30th of July 1947, under the watchful eyes of Dr Honner and the redoubtable Sr Anne Byrne RSJ. In July 1949 Dad took an appointment to the Tyndale Public School on the North Coast of New South Wales, as Principal – one teacher with 25 students, from Kindergarten to Intermediate Certificate. My earliest memories are of being marooned at Tyndale in June 1950 when the Clarence River had a major flood.
Most of my primary schooling was done in the country public schools where Dad was the teacher – the only teacher. I began Kindergarten pretty much at my leisure in 1952 when I was four and a half. I wandered across the school paddock that separated the residence from the school house at Tyndale and joined in. I repeated Grade 6 at the Wardell Convent under the tutelage of Sr Gregory (Phyllis) McCann RSJ. I remember her with affection.
My secondary school years were spent at Ballina High School. I am very grateful for my time there. I have good memories of most of my teachers – especially Mr George Hogg (English) and Ms Beryl Morgan (French). From time to time I have the pleasure of meeting those with whom I shared classes and playing fields. It is good to recall the memories.
I went straight to the seminary – St Peter Chanel’s Scholasticate, Toongabbie – after I completed the Leaving Certificate. That was the afternoon of Sunday the 31st of January 1965. There were fifteen of us. I cannot give an entirely clear explanation of why I did that, but I am very glad that I did. I have slowly discovered the great wisdom of the Marist charism. It focuses on presence – specifically as Mary was and remains present in the Church. That presence will be manifest in being “unknown and, as it were, hidden”.[9] The Marist way is to enable others to thrive and become the kind of people God intended and make the best contribution to the Church and society that they can. Fr Founder wanted Marists to be “instruments of mercy”. He said, “if I cannot save them with the law I’ll save them without it”. This sounds very much like the spirit of Pope Francis – especially in chapter 8 of Amoris Laetitia.
I was ordained on the 18th of May 1972, in St Patrick’s Church, Church Hill, on a wet Thursday evening, by Bishop Edward Kelly, later of Toowoomba.
My first appointment – in August of 1972 – was to St Patrick’s, where I worked mostly at Marist Chapel, Young Street in Circular Quay, with Fr Jim Hargrave SM. The next four and a half years – 1973-77 – were spent on the staff of Marist Regional College in Burnie, Tasmania.
In August of 1977 I began my post-graduate studies under Fr Adrian van Kaam CSSp at Duquesne University in Pittsburgh. Van Kaam – who died in 2007 – was a genius and a visionary. He was from the Netherlands and endured the Nazi occupation as a young man. At the request of Monsignor Montini at the Vatican – later, Pope Paul VI – he worked with young adults in study groups after the war, choosing to meet in factories rather than churches. He later gained his doctorate in psychology in Chicago and became head of the Psychology Department at Duquesne. Realizing the limited capacity of psychology to address the deeper issues of human life formation, he set up a special institute at Duquesne to promote the integration of theology and spirituality with other sources of wisdom, including psychology.
The starting point of Van Kaam’s thinking was human experience. It is there that we all come up against the inexhaustible intelligibility of things. This is mystery. Slowly – if we are open to it – we learn that life is a mystery to be lived, not a problem to be solved. Life is therefore better seen as conversation rather than imitation; there is no serious growth without serious listening; ideologies are death; grace perfects nature; relationships are of the essence.
Van Kaam had an enormous impact on my life. I remember him – and the opportunity given me by the Marists to study with him – with deep gratitude. My association with him – as friend, priest and academic – was liberating.
I completed my MA in 1979 and, after teaching at the Catholic Theological Union in Hunter’s Hill (CTU) for two years, returned to do my PhD. I went back to the CTU in 1984, was Principal 1989-1994, President of the Sydney College of Divinity 1989-90, and concluded my involvement with CTU at the end of 1995. After four years travelling and giving retreats and seminars in Australia and the Pacific, I was appointed as Director of the Aquinas Academy in 2000. Sr Marie Biddle RSJ, who also studied under Adrian van Kaam and with whom I worked at CTU, joined me at Aquinas. Marie has been a wonderful professional colleague and dear friend for more than thirty years. I treasure our friendship.
In 1994 I was a member of a small group convened by John Menadue with the intentions of holding a “festival of the laity”. We set that idea aside in favour of developing something more enduring. At the end of 1994, we began Catalyst for Renewal with the express purpose of promoting conversation for renewal of the Catholic Church. The intention has necessarily broadened to be conversation for renewal beyond the Catholic Church. My experience with Catalyst for Renewal prompted me to work for the development of a spirituality of conversation. That has been one of the more worthwhile projects I have ever undertaken. I welcome with open arms Pope Francis’ call to synodality.
In 2015 I was asked to be the Parish Priest at St Patrick’s. I am happy that I accepted. The previous 5-6 years living at Lane Cove in a Marist community with David Wilson SM and Jim Carty SM was especially life-giving. It reassured me that community living can be a very good thing. The Marist Community at St Patrick’s has likewise been most hospitable and – dare I say – patient with me as I have learned the ropes. I am loving the life and work here at St Patrick’s.
[1] I am indebted to my brother Gerard for his research in telling this story of Nellie Scanlan.
[2] The Beejapore, on the return journey, was lost at sea. All on board died.
[3] Founded by the Sisters of Mercy and attached to All Hallows School in Fortitude Valley.
[4] Though not terribly successful. They moved to Barcaldine after a business failure in Roma, and from Barcaldine to Longreach.
[5] The famous shearers strike in Barcaldine in 1891 saw the beginnings of the Labor Party. Was Patrick part of this?
[6] Chlorodyne was marketed as a cure for coughs, colds, asthma, migraines and bronchitis, as well as for the treatment of cholera symptoms. It was a mixture of laudanum (an alcoholic solution of opium), cannabis tincture and chloroform. Many of the knock-offs replaced laudanum with morphine hydrochloride and soon Chlorodyne dependence was a big problem. Over the years, the tincture of cannabis was removed from the formulation and the morphine content gradually lowered.
[7] In 1935 Nellie was awarded the King’s Jubilee Medal for her charity work and in 1936 she was awarded the MBE.
[8] In 1916, Nellie and her son-in-law – my grandfather, John Hickey – were the Waverley delegates to the Annual Conference of the Catholic Liberationists in Sydney. This organization was set up to fight for State support for Catholic Schools and orphanages.
[9] The words of our Founder, Fr Jean Claude Colin (1790-1875).
